So I bought a thing…

Some of my Cleveland people might recognize the black version of this from my years of Muay Thai posts.

I know, I should have used that money for furniture, at least for a couch. And I know, this wasn’t the most financially savvy move I could have made, especially in the midst of moving. Also, I already have the black one, so why did I buy another one, right?

Hear me out.

First of all, I used a credit card I had paid off with the stimulous check I received from the US, and I make enough money these days to pay it back off by February. I still have all the money in my German bank account that I reserved for the apartment.

Second of all, with VAT at its lowest since I moved here, if I was going to buy it, now would be the time. I mean, I did carefully consider the possibility of just bringing my Cleveland one with me when I go home again and paying the oversized baggage fee. But after considering that cost, on top of the pain-in-the-ass logistics of such a move, I decided to let Cleveland Punching Bag stay in Cleveland for now. At least until I have a better idea of what the future here will look like. If I do end up moving back to Cleveland, this thing is pretty resellable.

Third and most important of these reasons, when I left that bag in Cleveland, I left behind a piece of myself that I haven’t seen since I moved here, and I want it back. This void was most pronounced when I got my MS diagnosis last year, as I cried and lamented not having something there to feel the brunt of my absolute rage.

I miss having a vessel on which to unload my frustrations, my anger, my sadness, and that moment of calm clarity afterward.

I miss feeling my abdominal muscles tighten and strengthen when my kicks connected with the bag.

I miss trying out new fight moves, and feeling powerful and strong for it.

I miss how great my arms looked.

I miss Muay Thai.

With my new apartment and new city just weeks away, this new chapter in my life needed to include waking up a part of Laura that has been dormant for far too long.

Laura. Smash.

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